Discussing sexuality with your kids can be a tricky conversation to have. Most parents feel uncomfortable and unsure how to approach the topic.
However, as children grow and start experiencing physical and emotional changes, it is essential to educate them about sex and sexuality.
Why having conversations about sexuality with kids is essential
It is always better to prepare your child with knowledge instead of letting them figure out things themselves. Conversations about sex can help protect your child from sexual abuse, sexually transmitted infections, and unwanted pregnancies.
It also provides children with a better understanding of their bodies and builds their self-confidence.
When to begin talking about sexuality with kids
It is good to start having conversations about sexuality when your child is in preschool. You can initiate the conversation by discussing feelings and emotions, body parts, and how to respect their bodies and other people’s bodies.
As they grow older and reach puberty, it’s time to delve deeper and provide more detail about sex, relationships, and reproduction.
How to approach conversations about sexuality with kids
When you’re ready to talk with your child, choose the time and place wisely. You want to be in a comfortable location where you won’t be disturbed.
It’s okay to be a bit nervous about having these conversations, but stay calm, and speak in a way that’s age-appropriate and easy to understand.
You can initiate the conversation by asking open-ended questions such as “what do you know about sex?” or “have you ever heard of the term transgender?” This allows your child to demonstrate what they know and allows you to address any misconceptions they may have.
It is important that you use the correct terminologies when talking about genitals and body parts. This way, your child can communicate with you and other trusted adults if they need to.
Avoid using euphemisms or derogatory language when referring to body parts.
How to address tricky subjects and unexpected questions
When having conversations about sexuality, ensure that you’re both on the same page. Stick to the facts and provide age-appropriate information. Always listen carefully, remain calm, and be prepared to answer unexpected questions.
If you don’t know the answer, let your child know. However, reassure them that you will lookup the answer and get back to them.
Some tricky subjects such as masturbation, pornography, and contraceptives may arise during conversations about sexuality. Be prepared to approach these conversations with sensitivity, honesty, and compassion.
Provide your child with factual and unbiased information, and do not judge them or make them feel uncomfortable about their inquiries.
Teaching about respect and consent
It is essential to teach kids about respect and consent when discussing sexuality.
Children need to understand that they have the right to say no to physical contact that makes them feel uncomfortable, and they need to respect other people’s boundaries.
You can do this by having conversations about respecting other people’s bodies and telling them that their bodies belong to them alone.
Teach them that asking for consent before touching or hugging someone is essential and how to read body language and verbal cues.
The role of media and pornography in shaping children’s view on sexuality
Kids are exposed to sexual content on various media platforms. Parents need to educate their kids about the difference between fictional or exaggerated sexual scenarios depicted in the media and real-life situations.
Pornography is also another issue that parents need to address. Kids need to be directed on how to handle the sexualized messages present in mainstream pornography. Provide them with age-appropriate information on what healthy sex looks like and help them understand the ways they might be misled.
Conclusion
Discussing sexuality with kids can be challenging, but it’s better to start early.
By creating an open and comfortable environment, you can help your child build their self-esteem, teach them about respect and consent, and keep them safe from unwanted sexual experiences or infections. Remember to stay calm, speak plainly, and remain non-judgmental when answering questions to provide your child with accurate information.