Being single can be great, but it can also be daunting at times. While many people are perfectly content living their lives solo, the truth is that there are still social stigmas towards single people.
One of the most common stereotypes is that couples are better off than single men.
The Psychology of Coupling Up
While there are certainly perks to being single, studies have shown that being in a committed relationship can have benefits as well.
A study from the University of Rochester found that those in long-term relationships have a greater sense of feelings of purpose, sense of self, and self-worth. However, these findings don’t suggest that single people are inferior or that couples are better than single men.
It is essential to note that being in a committed relationship isn’t always smooth sailing. Relationships can be taxing and involve significant work towards communication and compromise, given the differences between two people.
While there are many great things about being in a relationship, there are also some downsides.
The Single Man Stereotype
Single men have often been stereotyped as bachelors, with a carefree and easy-going attitude to life. While there’s nothing inherently wrong with being this way, it can be harmful if it becomes a blanket assumption made about every single man.
Furthermore, the stereotype never acknowledges the fact that there are many reasons one could be single: financial difficulties, mental health reasons, and simple bad luck.
Why Do Partners Feel Superior?
One of the main reasons why couples may feel superior to single men is due to societal expectations. Society purposefully puts pressure on individuals to settle down and ‘grow up’.
Those who are in relationships tend to feel as though they’ve accomplished this expected milestone of adulthood, allowing them to feel superior to people who aren’t in a relationship.
Additionally, society equates being in a relationship with qualities like responsibility, maturity, emotional intelligence, and financial stability.
People in relationships, therefore, feel like they’re ticking off all the “boxes” that signify the hallmarks of a successful life.
The Fallacy of the Couple’s superiority
The fallacy of coupled superiority is that it doesn’t account for the fact that individuals who are single can still be happy, balanced, and successful.
Single men may have great careers, travel the world, make close friends, or even have casual sexual encounters that are satisfying. Furthermore, being single gives people the freedom to explore different aspects of their personalities, interests and hobbies, and lifestyles without the constraints of a long-term partner.
The pressure to settle
The pressure to find a long-term partner is a real and powerful thing. This pressure comes from various sources: family members, friends, societal expectations, and internalized beliefs about how life should look.
It can be challenging for single people to navigate this pressure, and it often leads to feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem.
It’s important to remember that being single is a valid choice. People can approach romantic relationships based on their beliefs and values. It’s important to note that settling down also doesn’t guarantee lifelong happiness.
Being happy is a personal choice, regardless of whether or not someone is in a relationship.
The Benefits of Being Single
Being single can have various benefits that people overlook. These benefits include:.
- Freedom: Single men have more freedom to pursue their interests and goals without balancing those with a partner’s needs. They can move cities, switch jobs, and travel alone without having to consider someone else’s needs.
- Mental Health Benefits: Studies show that single people can be healthier than those in troubled relationships. They have lower stress levels, more spare time to work on their mental health, and less anxiety about conflicts in their relationships.
- Time To Explore Yourself: Being unattached gives individuals time to explore themselves as individuals and what they need to be happy. This introduces the opportunity for personal growth.
The Double-Edged Sword of Relationships
While being in a long-term relationship has various benefits, it also carries some liabilities.
- Lack of Independence: When in a relationship, one has to consider the needs of their partner as much as their own. This diligence can sometimes come at the cost of one’s independence.
- Higher Levels of Anxiety: With intimacy comes the potential for anxiety. People in relationships are more likely to feel anxious about negative outcomes and worry about relationship conflicts.
- Cultural Changes: Cultural changes like marriage, children, and buying a house are expensive! Tackling these expenses can eat into your social life and personal time.
Conclusion
While being in a long-term relationship can be fulfilling, there are still many benefits to being single. Coupled individuals may feel superior to their single counterparts because of societal expectations that equate success with being a relationship.
However, success and happiness are personal concepts that all individuals must build for themselves.