Separation or divorce can be a tough moment in life for any family. It can particularly be harder for children because they may not fully understand the reason why their parents have decided to separate.
Therefore, explaining separation to our child is essential to help them cope with the changes.
1. Reduces anxiety
Children may feel anxious when they perceive their parents are not getting along well. They may also struggle to understand why their parents are fighting and why they want to separate.
Therefore, explaining to them in age-appropriate language the reasons why the separation has happened can help them feel less anxious. It can also give them a better understanding of the situation and what to expect in the future.
2. Provides clarity
Explaining separation to children provides clarity about what will happen next. It helps children understand who will be living where, what their schedule will be, and what to expect during visits.
Explaining what will happen after their parents separate can help children feel more in control, and less anxious.
3. Helps children feel safe
Separation can be especially difficult for children to understand. They may feel that they are losing a parent. Therefore, it is essential to remind them that both parents love them, even though they are not living together.
Reassuring them that they are not losing their family can help them feel loved and safe.
4. Encourages open communication
Explaining separation to children encourages open communication. Children will likely have questions about why their parents are separating, and it is essential to answer their inquiries in age-appropriate language.
Parents should also encourage open communication with their children, as this can help children feel heard and understood.
5. Helps children cope with change
Change can be scary for children, and separation can constitute significant changes for them. Explaining separation to children can help them understand the new family dynamic and can help equip them with tools to cope with the changes.
It can also help them understand that change can be a normal experience, and that they will eventually adjust to their new situation.
6. Promotes emotional intelligence
Children who have had separation explained to them at an early age tend to be more emotionally intelligent and can express their emotions better.
Explaining separation to children shows them that talking about emotions, including sadness and anger, is healthy and normal. It can help children navigate relationships, even beyond their family.
7. Encourages healthy relationships
Teaching children about healthy relationships sets the foundation for their relationships in the future. Explaining separation to children, and helping them understand why it happened can be a lesson in healthy relationships.
Showing children how to communicate and resolve conflicts can teach them how to form and maintain healthy relationships in the future.
8. Provides closure
Explaining separation to children provides closure for them. They may feel that they were powerless in a significant family change, and that their voice was not heard.
Giving children the opportunity to ask questions and express their emotions can provide closure, and ensure they have a better understanding of why the separation happened.
9. Promotes resilience
Explaining separation to children can help children be more resilient to change and stressful moments in life. It can teach them that change is hard, but it can be lived through, and that they will eventually adapt to it.
10. Affirms family values
Explaining separation to children can affirm family values. It can teach them about love, compassion, and caring for one another.
It shows them that a family is not defined by where they live or who they live with, but by the love they have for each other. Ultimately, it can reinforce the understanding that family comes in many different shapes and sizes.